Slow Progress-Meaning
As Simon Sinek would ask, 'What is your Why?'
Understanding why we do what we do is something that is within us, yet we don’t always ask ourselves such a question and rarely go deep into the meaning of why.
I could have chosen to walk 52 miles per week for the 52 weeks of any year. And, physically at least, it would have been easier to do it when I was 32 years old than when I was 52 years old. So why wait until I was 52 years old? It’s simple: there is more meaning for me to do it when the numbers align than when I am some random age! (I have joked, probably with too many people, that I am glad there aren’t 60 weeks in a year… although that would have given me another 8 years of training to prepare for the challenge!)
I quite like the esoteric – not in a way that I like to know things that others don’t, more that I value things that have personal meaning, that provide intrinsic value and rewards rather than anything external. Back in 2013 I won a 50-mile ultramarathon that was run on the trails north of Limassol, Cyprus, during the high heat and humidity of July.
[Tim’s Notes: here I could properly go off on a Throbber/Influencer/Special Forces rant around how painful it was, how few have completed it, how I STILL HOLD THE COURSE RECORD, but I won’t bother…]
I have a t-shirt that has ‘Cyprus Ultra 50 Miles – Winner’ on it, but rarely, if ever, wear it – and when I do it is usually under another running top. Earlier in the same year I was second in the Paphos Marathon, the morning after a rather large social on RAF Akrotiri, where we lived, and about 4 hours sleep. Both results provided extrinsic recognition and reward. Yet the run that means the most to me from my time in Cyprus – when I was a lazy, unemployed stay-at-home dad – was a training run I did with a friend and running colleague, which we called ‘Surf to Sky.’
Straight away let me tell you that the description of the run is technically a lie as I was unable to find a hill on Cyprus that reached the sky (neither have I been able, before or since, to find such a hill, although on some training runs, I did think I might be on one…). However, I was easily able to find the surf and we decided to run to the highest possible place on the island that we could get to – the top of Mount Troodos.
Of course, here is another lie: we didn’t get to the top because the US military have a compound right on top of Mount Troodos, meaning you cannot get access to the top. So, our run could have been named ‘The Seashore at RAF Akrotiri to close enough to the gate of the US Military compound at the top of Mount Troodos but far enough away so that you don’t get shot or challenged!’ Or, more catchily, ‘Surf to Sky!’
The distance, at 43 miles, and the overall elevation climbed were both less than the Cyprus Ultra, but, to me it had more meaning. In the Cyprus Ultra I was racing other people.
For the Surf to Sky, it was simply a run we had chosen to do. It had no relevance to other people, and it had no meaning other than that which we bestowed upon it. That we gave it such an iconic name indicates what it meant to us. But it was fucking hard – which you would understand if you looked at an elevation map of the route. In essence, if you looked at a skateboard park and looked at the edges you would see something like the route map. A route that started with very little elevation gain, yet which continued to become steeper and steeper.
That was the meaning!
With Challenge 52, it was the numbers that gave it it’s meaning:
52 miles per week, for the
52 weeks of the year, that I am
52 years old.
So much better than something like:
52 miles per week, for the
52 weeks of the year, that I am
32 years old…
Walking lacks purpose - but has great meaning for me
And why walking and not running, when running had been such a massive part of my life (and not always in a positive way as I will go into later in this journey)?
The answer is simple:
Running has never been a de-stressor for me.
It has always been for a purpose – even if that purpose is the relatively meaningless purpose of training to compete at running events. Walking on the other hand, has always been purposeless: In my family, I was always the fastest runner but the slowest walker.
[Tim’s Notes: As of writing my Mum is 79 years old, so I can’t really justify telling you I am the slowest walker in the family anymore, but I will stick with this blag for the benefit of this story…]
Because walking wasn’t about getting anywhere quickly. It was quite literally about the journey. If I wanted to get somewhere quickly, I would run!
Walking was about the journey.
What I found was that this lack of purpose provided the space for meaning to emerge. I know that might sound contradictory in many ways, particularly if you consider how sexy ‘purpose’ is in the business and leadership worlds. Simon Sinek made his mark with purpose via his Golden Circles and ‘Start with Why,’ and I do find his work useful. It’s just that it isn’t everything. (I go into this more in another chapter where I consider knowing who you are as being more important than where you are going or why you are doing something.)
Earlier in my life, walking had meaning because it had no purpose. I did it just to do it. Walking became even more meaningful when it developed a purpose – when it consciously became part of my therapy for psychological wellbeing.
It is the internal meaning, not the external prize
As I have already suggested, I am not big into chasing external validation or ‘prizes.’ Instead, I value doing something that has an inner meaning for me, and bollocks to what others thinks. And that is why I made my 52-week challenge mundane. It was never going to be about undertaking what is felt to be a superhuman effort. It was about demonstrating the meaning in the mundane daily activity of getting outside and walking. It was about the meaning in the need for long-term, consistent investment in my psychological wellbeing. It was about demonstrating that I can, with effort, make my psychological wellbeing a priority whilst keeping going with everyday life.
What could be more meaningful than that?
